- Emotional Intimacy
(“in-to-me-see”) – I learned how to be emotionally honest about what I am feeling and thinking. In doing this I replaced my fear based thoughts with God thoughts. I never was honest about my feelings and in fact spent all of my childhood and a lot of my early adulthood suppressing, repressing, minimizing and denying my feelings. My feelings were the ‘enemy’. Today I know that my feelings are a gift from the God of my understanding to help me connect with my body and my Self. - Self-Nurturing – I am able to take care of my inner child in such a way that I feel safe and protected in the world. I was never held and gently touched as a child and as a result always felt dis-connected to the world, which frightened me and gave more fuel to my ego. I felt alone. Today as I nurture myself I am in harmony with my divine Self and conscious of this life force energy. I am never alone.
- Unconditional Love & Acceptance – Turning my will and life over to the care of God gave me an intuitive understanding that I AM a ‘perfect’ child of God now, as is, so I can love and accept myself (and others) ‘without behavioral conditions’ especially when I display less than perfect behavior. Understanding the Language of Feelings helped me to accept and love myself and others regardless of their less than perfect behavior. I learned how to stop suppressing, repressing, minimizing, denying and judging what I was feeling. I understand today that what happened actually happened for the evolution of my immortal soul. Unconditionally loving and accepting myself gave me the serenity I had been searching for.
- Boundary Protection – Allows me to feel safe and secure in the world because I have mastered how to maturely protect my boundaries to the right person, in the right manner, to the right degree and in the right way. I had no clue what boundaries were and as a result, walked all over mine and everyone else’s on a regular basis. My temper tantrums took the forms of screaming, yelling, slamming, pouting, crying and then walking away. As I became more conscious, setting boundaries gave me the distinction that I needed between me and the people in my life and gave me integrity.
- Validating My Life – Helped me to “own” the whole truth about everything I experienced in my life. This meant accepting, at the deepest level, that what happened actually happened so I could truly say “YES” to life. Accepting this truth, as is, put my ego out of a job.Most of my life I spent dissing myself and making excuses for everyone around me. In the end, there was no life left in me. I had completely turned my will and my life over to my EGO. Today I give value to my feelings with well grounded evidence of why my feelings aren’t right, wrong good or bad,they are just what I am feeling. When I validate my feelings, my ego has nothing else to do.
- Three EGO S’s – Using my self-parenting techniques, which make me feel safe,sane and secure in the world, made my child-like ego defenses that I needed to survive when I was a child, obsolete. As a child I needed the protection of my ego defenses because I was too small, vulnerable and naïve to protect my Self. I couldn’t protect myself against large, powerful adults who acted out in dysfunctional ways. Today I use my ego and am not used by it. I use the three S’s as I validate myself. I know that it’s safe for me to feel what I feel, that my Self will always be here to protect me which makes me feel sane and secure.
- Four P’s of a Self-Mastered Adult – I now use my Adult Powers to Protect me, which makes my world safe. I give myself Permission to live my life by my own set of rules that are based on my own unique, moral and ethical standards. I have integrated my Self-Parenting exercises into my daily life to such a degree that “I AM” my Self-mastery message of unconditional love and acceptance. Thank you God!
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Thank you Hu, HLC and Deborah, for this blog. These Self Mastery tools found using the Hu Method have helped a great deal in my journey of recovery. Prior to working with an HLC coach, I had done a lot of inner reflection and I had also made massive changes in my life, my behavior and in my thinking. It was all good stuff and I cleaned up my past, trusted in God and helped others. But, there remained a gnawing in my heart and the negative sound of low self-esteem in my mind, and I continued to be accessed by things that other people said and did. The Self-Parenting exercises seemed awkward at first and my ego mind resisted the slight mention of performing this life changing action. My ego fought diligently to stay on top and “in charge.”
These methods work quickly though, and after a short time, I began to truly love the Diane that I am…………….AND, I had less and less dependency upon my children, my grandchildren and my husband for the way I felt and how I responded to life. I began to see that it is my responsibility and mine alone to nurture, love and protect my Self. That was huge! I now had a way to do that as opposed to hiding, running, expecting, and coercing. Wow!
HLC’s proven methods worked so well for me that I not only began to practice these methods as a way of life, but I decided to coach others to do the same. I am the recipient of much healing and Self-appreciation and I have so many opportunities to share these methods with others in recovery. Join us on this journey and enhance your recovery as so many others have done. Remember: Nothing changes if nothing changes!
I’ve been reading these blog articles for while now and the integration of the healing program is very interesting. I have a friend who is in recovery and I am referring her to them. Thank you for the share.
I wish I had these articles and knew of this website in the beginning of my recover journey!
None-the-less I am enjoying them now, thank you.
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