What Do All Consciously Awakened Spiritual Relationships Need?
by Hu Dalconzo

One of the best ways for you to support your spiritual growth is to be in a relationship with someone who wants to create a "partnership" that uses RESPONSIBILITY COMMUNICATION. Spiritual relationships accelerate your Self-mastery growth process because they create a space where it is safe to feel what you are feeling. No matter how long you've been on a spiritual path, sooner or later you must "get off your knees" and apply what you have learned.

RESPONSIBILITY COMMUNICATION is a communication technique for people who seek to build a consciously awakened, spiritual relationship. I learned my communication skills from my family, and as the founder of a "Spirit First!" organization, this created a dilemma for me because my family didn't know how to communicate responsibly. Therefore, I needed to learn a communication technique that would foster the growth of a healthy, progressive, relationship that could be used at home, during a counseling session, or in my holistic office.

I needed a communication method that my organization and I could use to replace the "OLD-WORLD" system, which is entrenched in judgment and criticism. I needed to find a communication model that fostered unconditional love and acceptance, but it also needed to be productive and progressive. I needed to find a "NEW WORLD" communication model!

I believe that the biggest challenge to transcending the old world communication model is... NEGATIVE THIRD PARTY COMMUNICATION. I believe that unconscious THIRD PARTY COMMUNICATION is where most communications break down.

Negative third party communication happens when people don't consciously understand that they are responsible for their own feelings. They withhold communications about their true feelings from the person who triggers their uncomfortable sensations and find a third party to unload on. They usually do this because they are hoping that their third party will agree with them and join them in judging the alleged offender.

"When we see the personality in dysfunction, we do not think of what this reveals about the soul. Yet the personality is specific aspects of the soul reduced to a physical form. Therefore, dysfunctions of the personality cannot be understood without an understanding of the soul."
- GARY ZUKAV

When left unchecked, negative third party communication will implode the life force of corporations, families, and spiritual relationships. Knowing this, I searched to find a communication technique that would solve this third party "old world" communication model.

The solution is RESPONSIBILITY COMMUNICATION, a communication technique originally developed by Dr. Michael Ryce for people who realize that they are responsible for their own feelings. Responsibility communication can be used by anyone who wants to create a positive, loving environment where the spiritual and emotional well being of its members comes first.

When you communicate with someone and that communication triggers pain, this situation creates an ideal opportunity to heal what is being emotionally triggered. I believe that... PAIN IS GOOD! But, I'm NOT saying that pain feels good. I'm saying that pain is good because it is... a warning device. It warns you that your behavior, thoughts, or feelings are out of harmony with your intuitive heart. When something triggers you and you feel pain, this is the perfect time to explore what you're feeling with someone you emotionally trust; someone like a spiritual partner who has committed to using the... seven rules of responsibility communication.

The objective of responsibility communication is to create a safe space with a spiritual partner where you can objectively view what you are FEELING. If your intention is to find the source of your pain so that you can heal it, then you'll need to understand that your pain is being stimulated in the PRESENT but it's usually manifesting from your PAST. That's because your present relationship is triggering old emotional wounds from your past that were never healed.

SEVEN STEPS TO "COMMUNICATE RESPONSIBLY"

1. COMMIT TO USING THE RESPONSIBILITY COMMUNICATION PROCESS. Accept that... your feelings are your feelings, and your feelings are your sole responsibility to heal. When someone upsets you, realize that they may have stepped on your toe, but if your toe still hurts after an hour or so, it hurts because it was already infected. In this case, the source of your pain is rooted in your personal history, not in your partner's less than perfect behavior!

2. OBJECTIVELY OWN YOUR FEELINGS. Always start by identifying and owning that your feelings are your feelings..."I need your help in understanding my feelings when (event) happened. Are you willing to help me understand why I'm feeling what I'm feeling?" Objectively describe what happened without judgment or blame, using "I feel" statements.

3. IDENTIFY AND SHARE YOUR FEELINGS AND OBSERVATIONS. Stay conscious to the fact that your thoughts are creating your feelings. If your partner's actions trigger pain in you, your MIND must be pulling up information from your memory files... your history. This takes you away from the present moment which is your source of power. Your feelings are being re-created from painful experiences that can go as far back as childhood. That's why you may find yourself asking: "Why is this happening to me... AGAIN?"

4. FOLLOW YOUR FEELINGS TO THEIR SOURCE. Use these Self-mastery Processes, or any other method that you know of, that will help you surface the root cause of your unpleasant feelings. Remember that your mind will use ego defenses in an attempt to minimize your pain.

5. SET AN APPOINTMENT. If it is not the appropriate time or place to use responsibility communication, set an appointment for when and where you can calmly and safely share your FEELINGS. The benefit of setting an appointment is that it will allow you time to center yourself. You'll need to be emotionally calm so that you can maturely identify, understand, and rationally share the real cause of your uncomfortable feelings!

6. HEAL FIRST...PROBLEM SOLVE LAST. Feel what you're feeling by using the FEELING CHART found in Lesson #4. Identify the root cause before you try to solve the problem. Remember that your MIND will use problem solving (thinking) as a way to distract you from feeling what you are actually feeling.

7. LEARN THE EIGHT HELPFUL HINTS FOR SPIRITUAL COMMUNICATIONS. They will help you find the thing, behind the thing, behind the thing, why you are feeling the way you are feeling (see next subtitle)!

RESPONSIBILITY COMMUNICATION will help you to find the source of your emotional pain. Remember that the pain you are feeling is being stimulated by your partner in the PRESENT, but is usually manifesting from an old relationship from your PAST.

Namaste, my soul friends..... Hu Dalconzo

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